Police emails! Argh!

August 8, 2009

In a recent jousting of emails between PC Potato and myself, PC Potato asked me whether I had felt that he/she had undermined me in the past. I was livid that PC potato had the nerve to ask me this ludicrous questions knowing full well that he/she had done SEVERAL TIMES.

Some freinds advised me, like a good boy, not to repond to the email; because if my response contained my true feelings, which it would have, it would no doubt have landed me in some conversation with the PSD suits. Thus far I have chosen not to respond to PC Potatoto’s question about whether I felt he had undermined me. Till now that is; in my space here this is what I would have liked to write:

“Dear PC Potato, In response to your email, I have to say yes, I do feel you have undermined me in the past, not once but several times, and I hope that you will not continue to do so. Sergeant Tea Twining.”

However, what  I really wanted to say was this: ” PC Potato, In response to your email contact to me please find details as follows: (1) You took credit in presenting a retiring gift on behalf of the BPA; I was never reimbursed for any of the gifts or awards that I purchased on behalf of the BPA; and I am still about £100 out of pocket. (2) Some years ago you called a kangaroo court meeting of the BPA with me where I was referred to as a loose canon and pushed to resign. That was clearly your intention and the intention of others; to push me out.  You then failed to produce minutes. (3) In my reign over the BPA you met with a Chiefsy without first advising me. Then in a conniving manner you met with my second in command and advised her that the Chiefsy would rather support her in taking up the reigns of the BPA. Since you hadn’t the courtesy or courage to advise me of these meetings before they occurred, I asked you outright. You ummd and arrd and then stated you met with the Chiefsy in your personal capacity. Really. You also conveniently missed out the conversation details you had with my second in command. I fully understand why you undermined me; meeting with Chiefsy makes you feel good.  Having decided not to have anything to do with the BPA it was a surprise to see you stand up again once Chiefsy had said he/she would support local BPA members reaching the dizzy heights of the NBPA. Suddenly you put your name in the hat to represent our BPA nationally. Oooo. Clearly Chiefsy is looking after you. Please realise that whilst you do these things you are a part of the problem and I do rather hope that you do not continue to do these things again. However, I remain Strong in my belief that just as long as you are OK and looked after, you will continue to do these things and gain the trust of Chiefsy over tea. But please remember for all the hard work that goes on outside to win trust by all officers, it is you that is letting the service down. Yours… Sergeant Tea Twining.”

Now, can you imagine the kerfuffle that would have occurred had I been honest and responded to this PC Potato in this way? The art of avoiding a complaint against oneself involves the correct use of police email in a way that someone else can’t use the email against you.


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